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Slice 124 of 365

Dear Santa, does it bother you that your name also spells satan and that you both wear red? Freud might have a field day with that. 

Dear Tooth Fairy, are adult teeth worth more?

Dear Donald Duck, what’s up with the lack of pants?

Dear SNL, why?

Dear Post Office, have you lost my publishers clearing house winnings?

Dear Ford, where’s my flying car?

Dear White House, were there really two Bush’s for president or did I imagine that?

Dear imagination, if the above was you, you suck.

Dear America, if it wasn’t my imagination you suck more. 

Dear chocolate, please stop calling me. (Just kidding, I’ll leave the door open…)

Dear ice cream, keep driving if you see chocolate’s car, unless…

Dear tomorrow, stop coming so fast. 

Dear birthdays, see above. 

Dear exercise, call way, way more often. 

Dear universe, shape up already. 

Dear TV, well, you know. 

Dear Siri, I need a “clean the house” app. 

Dear memory, I, um… Shoot…

Dear Mike and Joey, I miss you. 

Until tomorrow…