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Slice 99 of 365

I finally pulled the trigger today and returned the cable box and cancelled it.  Well just the TV service at least. The phone stays for the time being and the internet I need for work, which has actually been pretty steady this particular week.

There is an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond (how ironic is it I use a TV show for an example here) where Robert is having trouble paying his bills.  He’s a cop and crime is down and isn’t that supposed to be a good thing except hours are being cut because of it, another irony.

He goes to Ray’s house to watch TV and Ray says, “You couldn’t even keep basic cable?” Robert is 17 feet tall but shrinks into himself anyway at the statement. Like it was a sin to let it go. Now Ray is a TV junkie so I get that but it made Robert feel like a failure which I also get.

Not being able to keep the cable TV is definitely adding to the ever growing failure level I’m feeling lately.

Why is it a failure?

That’s what I’m asking myself. How have I come to the conclusion that not being able to afford cable TV is some kind of failure? I’m so programmed and focused that it’s a basic necessity? To keep up with the Joneses? Habit? Fear?

All of the above, plus more, is my ultimate feeling, but the sense of it being a failure is what needs to be changed.

Maybe the actual failure is not having giving it up sooner or having had it at all.  TV shows, movies too, are what helped to program me in the first place.

Maybe the success is in doing the right, responsible things to keep the real necessities.

The failure isn’t in the loss, the failure is in the sheep-like thinking. 

The success is in doing it, moving on and growing with it. 

Besides, think of all the writing (or editing Dena…) I can do instead of watching TV?

Until tomorrow…