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Slice 34 of 365

There is no work again today. That’s about a week now. I’d be scared if I wasn’t already so freaked out. It requires a lot of energy to be freaked out, energy I should devote to looking for other jobs even though work will probably pick up but I can’t chance it. The uncertainty of it is quickly whittling away at an already thin sanity level.

I spent most of today researching and applying for jobs online. Jumping through virtual hoops as it were. I did a few things around the house before I started and it occurred to me that except for the not making any money part this not working stuff is actually a pretty good gig.

I need to do this full time!

How you say?

Well Congress is full of people who do nothing so there must be lots of opportunities out there for it. If that many people, meaning the American public, are willing to elect/hire large groups of people and pay them to do nothing then there must be at least one person I can find to pay me to do nothing, don’t you think? (see above, whittling away sanity. Perhaps chopping furiously is a better description.)

I have close to 50 years experience of doing nothing on a regular, daily basis.

I train in doing nothing daily.

I would consider myself an expert in the art of doing nothing, I could teach it.

I can do nothing at my home office or travel.

I can do nothing on any shift required.

I can do nothing while sleeping. (how many jobs can you do while you’re sleeping?)

I can do nothing for the rest of my life so you have my full, life-long loyalty.

I can do nothing when ill and when on vacation.

I can do nothing seven days a week.

If required I can be trained to do less than nothing.

I can do nothing in death for eternity.

If anyone is interested please contact me quickly because I am very anxious to start doing nothing as soon as possible.

How has no one else thought of this? (See above again, whittling and chopping have been taken over by several large chain saws whizzing all around)

Until tomorrow…